I am in a season of my life where I am unsure if I should take a leap or be still. Something that I have been asking God for has presented itself to me and I am at a crossroad. Do I stay or do I go?
I have been here a few times before. Where my current situation is rocky and it looks fruitless and my emotions are everywhere. One minute I am confident in the leap, the next I am not and wondering whether it’s just a good idea or a “God” idea.
A few months ago when I presented this same idea to my therapist, she told me to put aside my feelings and desires for a moment and take a look at the facts. Can I afford it? Is it reasonable? How much time do I have?
The thing with me is that when I am in the middle of “take a leap or be still”, there is this battle that’s is going on. A battle between faith and fear. “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen”. Fear is “False evidence appearing real”. The world tells me that I have to see it to believe it, God tells me to believe it then I will see it.
I mentioned before on a podcast that what really matters in life is the journey in between. I don’t think that God is concerned with the decision that I make more than he is concerned with my character. We can be so focused on trying to make the “right” decision, when God is telling us “either way, I will be with you. I will never leave nor forsake you”. I have learned to put my eyes on God when I hit a fork in the road. It’s not about the decision, it’s about me being the clay on the potters wheel.
If you have ever watched the “Wizard of Oz” then you remember when Dorothy meets the scarecrow at a fork in the road. Dorothy asks “Now which way do we go?” and the scarecrow points in one direction and says “that way is a very nice way”, then he points in the other direction and says “It’s pleasant down that way too!” and then he points in both directions and says “of course people do go both ways. That’s the trouble. I can’t make up my mind. I haven’t got a brain.”
In this scene we see how when we are at a fork in the road, it really doesn’t matter which way we decide to go as long as we use our brains and make a decision and not stand around like scarecrows without a brain, only pondering which way to go. Make a decision, stick with it, and have faith.
What determines our decisions all depends on what or who we set our eyes on. For me, I have decided to turn my eyes away from the fork in the road for a moment, and have a conversation with God. Proverbs 19:2 says “The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, but everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty”. I didn’t understand the word “hasty”, so I looked it up, haste means, excessive speed or urgency. Right then and there I knew what decision to make. To be still, be diligent, and to be the clay.
In this season, I have given myself 6 months to take a leap, and anything before that is hasty. Just because something comes up that is exactly what you want, we have to remember, that the enemy hears our prayers too. God doesn’t want us rushing into anything and it’s important to know when to say ‘no” and to take heed to that.
It was so tempting to say yes so prematurely, out of fear and confusion. But, God is not the author of confusion, nor does he do anything out of order or in haste. I told my friend that I was afraid that this opportunity might pass me by. It won’t, like Myleik Teele said, “what is for you will not pass you by”. The enemy is funny like that, he will present us with something prematurely and feed off our fears.
In conclusion, when it comes to making big life decisions we have to apply biblical principles and remember that feelings are not facts. We do not have to believe every thought we think or every emotion we feel. We are not scarecrows, we have brains that God has given us to use, so we must use them to make a decision and not ponder our lives away. Finally, we must have faith, faith that no matter what decision we make, God will be with us every step of the way.
-Kaitlin Alexander